Regaining and Sustaining Relationship Bliss
Lynn is a very successful entrepreneur who called me about an issue in her relationship. She and her fiancé had been together for three years, and she told me they had everything: a great day-to-day relationship, and several successful businesses. Now problems had started, with one argument leading to another. Her fiancé had left her six months before.
I went through my usual set of questions with Lynn, and gave her a check mark on almost everything. She was meditating regularly, working out every day, eating right, and succeeding in businesses that she adored. I moved on to her fiancé, and I asked, “Is he still meditating?” Lynn responded, “I don’t know.” My next question was, “Have you ever meditated together?” Her answer here was, “No.”
I explained the four principles of relationship bliss to Lynn, and the triangle concept of true love. I told her, “The moment one or both of you stop growing in love and wisdom as a person, there are going to be issues. If you or your partner has not been sensitive and caring enough of the other, start focusing on your meditation practice. Meditation is like a steering wheel that keeps you in check, and a relationship on course. The secret of sustaining true love is personal growth, where every day you are trying to connect with your own higher Soul qualities.
I shared with Lynn, “It is quite normal for you and your partner to take each other for granted or to be insensitive to the other if you have been in the relationship a while. Meditating together every day is a way to bring the two of you back in alignment if you are off-balance. Just the practice of meditation helps you connect with the love within yourself. Meditation is the greatest way to feel love and to deepen your oneness with your significant other. The fourth principle of moksha, or mental freedom, will bring you close again, but to implement moksha, you need meditation.”
Meditation (Refer book Yoga & Love: Yoga key 2) is the most powerful tool for personal and relationship growth.
Why? For love to blossom there should be no barriers, and only freedom. Meditation frees us from selfishness, squabbles, and other petty conflicts. Complete oneness in love is possible by working towards perfecting moksha (conscious freedom from suffering): Walls disappear when we experience conscious silence together with our mate, for it is a meeting of the higher us with our partner’s higher self. Deep connection happens in silence, and so meditating together dissolves walls which can separate two lovers. Remember, through meditation, there is a natural awakening of the heart chakra, the region of unconditional love.
I also made the point to Lynn that there are no perfect humans, so it helps to stop projecting a desire for perfection onto another person.
A month later, I heard from Lynn again. She wrote, “We are back together; thanks for your help! We have meditated about ten hours together over the past week, and we plan to always meditate together as you suggested.” A month later, I got another email, in which she wrote:
We just got married! Dave said he realized how much he loved me. He said wherever he went, he just couldn’t take his mind away from me. We are looking forward to living our lives according to the four principles and helping each other achieve our goals. Most importantly, [we are going to continue to] work on the fourth principle of moksha (freedom from suffering) through meditation. It just gives so much harmony to our lives.”
"It is about learning to love from the inside out. Yes a big part of the book is about Yoga, but the core message of it , is learning to and how to love yourself on the inside. It emphasizes so much on focusing on yourself, that is such a refreshing perspective on relationships.” Paulina D, San Diego, CA
"The core message of the book is before you unite with someone try to unite with yourself. It is learning about yourself, finding yourself and then if you choose to you can find love on the outside . The book gives ways to do just that in simple step by step way.” 
"Yoga is a life long process and the goal of life is self exploration. The book inspires me to make myself whole, integrated, to feel complete unto myself. Once I do that , I will attract a holistic, integrated person who is a totality of himself, which is how a relationship is supposed to be.” 
"Yoga is love, love is Yoga. It is not a relationship book, it is not just a love book, it is a lifestyle book. It is educational, informative, a message that everybody can apply. It teaches you how to be a better person, so that you don’t just find the love of your life but learn to have better relationships with everyone.” 