A friend of mine was a real “guy’s guy.” He was not a strong believer in love and just went after the physical aspects. But then he met a girl online who lived in another country. The two of them would talk for 18 hours a day. This was quite a drastic change for a man who normally wanted to get straight to the physical aspects. Not even I was aware that my friend and this young lady were developing a relationship with one another.
While the concept of forming relationships online is still fairly new, the concept of building relationships from afar, or through correspondence, is not. From Georgia O’Keeffe, Ernest Hemmingway, Benjamin Franklin, to John Steinbeck, there are countless public figures from the past that sent letters to their lovers. The introduction of the Internet has only expedited the speed in which two people are able to communicate and made it possible for more people to easily meet others they might never have a chance to encounter otherwise.
So what does Yoga have to say about online relationships? Yoga wisdom tells us that we must first know ourselves. When we know ourselves we know how to set proper boundaries. We are able to ask the right questions not only that, we are more willing to ask the difficult questions that others may avoid. It is important to ask the right questions, even if they are difficult, because they are good indicators if something feels off or awkward. If something is not right from the beginning it will continue to manifest as the relationships becomes more solidified.
Yoga wisdom also presses the importance of balance. One of the benefits of forming a relationship online is it enables a person to get to know another’s mind and spirit without being so caught up in and distracted by the physical aspects. It enables those who may be a bit shy to open up easier. When the focus is upon the conversation it enables that conversation to either go deeper or sink on site. As I have discussed in past blog posts and in Yoga & Love, like an iceberg, we can physically see a small portion of a person’s being while the rest is hidden underneath the surface. When the physical aspects are removed it enables a person to peel away the layers of another’s mind, spirit, and emotions. It is a wonderful opportunity to develop an emotional bond and a satisfying friendship with another person.
After media coverage of the developments in the recent Manti Te’o Hoax many have raised questions about the validity, and even the safety, of forming online relationships. Is it really safe to meet a stranger online? In truth, it does not matter where you meet someone it is still our responsibility to keep our interactions with someone new safe and enjoyable. This is why it is so critically important to know ourselves first before approaching any possibilities for a romantic relationship and be willing to set boundaries. This is also why it is so critical to ask the right questions and listen to your intuition if something does not feel right.
What about forming a relationship online with someone you have already met? The same wisdom will apply regardless of whether you met the person online or offline. There is no data to prove that meeting someone in person has a higher success rate than those who meet and develop a relationship online.
Here is the summary of what Yoga wisdom has to say on this topic:
- Know yourself
- Establish proper boundaries
- Know the intentions of the other person
- Ask the right questions
- Be willing to ask the difficult questions
- Trust your intuition if something is awkward or doesn’t feel right
The story I told in the beginning of this post has a happy outcome. I am pleased to say that my friend and his partner have been married eight years now and am still very much in love. When we know who we are and radiate love we raise our magnetism to the point where a person can attract their ideal partner to them. When your love magnet is operating at peak levels nothing will stand between you and the love of your life, not even the Internet.
"It is about learning to love from the inside out. Yes a big part of the book is about Yoga, but the core message of it , is learning to and how to love yourself on the inside. It emphasizes so much on focusing on yourself, that is such a refreshing perspective on relationships.” Paulina D, San Diego, CA
"The core message of the book is before you unite with someone try to unite with yourself. It is learning about yourself, finding yourself and then if you choose to you can find love on the outside . The book gives ways to do just that in simple step by step way.” 
"Yoga is a life long process and the goal of life is self exploration. The book inspires me to make myself whole, integrated, to feel complete unto myself. Once I do that , I will attract a holistic, integrated person who is a totality of himself, which is how a relationship is supposed to be.” 
"Yoga is love, love is Yoga. It is not a relationship book, it is not just a love book, it is a lifestyle book. It is educational, informative, a message that everybody can apply. It teaches you how to be a better person, so that you don’t just find the love of your life but learn to have better relationships with everyone.” 